I think I’m becoming an adult. I realize that that is an odd thing to say, considering I am 25 and should see myself as an adult already, but I kinda don’t yet. Not that I see myself as a teenager, either… I’m just a “student”: That weird limbo area between education and the real world. In my 25 years of life, I have yet to have a job that completely covers my living expenses. I hope that will come in two years time when I am finally done school.
Physically, I know I have surpassed being an adult and have gone straight to being old. That happened at the ripe old age of 21. A serious hip operation would suck the youth out of anyone, I think. Now I think back fondly to the time when I had flexibility in my right hip, as I painfully exercise and stretch in the hopes of gaining it back.
By “becoming an adult” I mean taking control of my own actions and decisions without needing approval from anyone. There are people in my life who’s opinions and advice mean a lot to me, but I am coming to realize, more and more, that this is my life and I am free to live it how I want. I also take more stock in how I spend my time. Studying minimalism and mindfulness, working through Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way, reading and attempting to follow Ruiz’s The Four Agreements, I’ve realized that they all have the same message: happiness is to spend your time intentionally doing things you love. And I have started to do that, trying to actively ween myself away from digital distractions and push myself to spend time doing things I want to do. And they are all right, I am happier! On the flip-side, however, I find myself more easily irritated when I have to spend my time doing something I don’t want to do, or doing something that wastes my time. Do I want to go out for drinks with people I don’t like? No. That would be a huge waste of my time. Would I get more out of going home and reading a book? Yes. Heck yes.
“I’m an adult. I can do what I want!” I use to ironically yell in a fake temper tantrum. But guess what, ladies and gentlemen… who are my life colleagues now, I guess… I am an adult and I can do what I want. So there! *Blows raspberry*